Friday, January 3, 2014

Sisters Are Doin' It...



These days, trying to find a good lesbian movie is like trying to find…ummm…Name one, I dare you…Personal Best?  Nope…The Children’s Hour?  HA!  Making Love?  Maybe…Windows?  Almost!  Have you seen Windows?  Talia Shire plays a stuttering straight woman stalked by her lesbian neighbor, shittily played by Elizabeth Ashley, who hires a man to rape Adrian, err, I mean, Talia Shire and record her stuttering moans and screams…Really!  I heard stutterers protested this movie back in 1980.  I still can’t believe Talia Shire has 2 oscar nominations.  Makes my head spin, really…

So...Good lesbian movies…The Killing of Sister George, you say?  YYYYYES!!!  My most favorite dykodrama ever.  Now, I don’t pretend to know how lesbians live.  I don’t even have a lesbian friend, but this movie comes pretty darn close to what I think lesbians are about.  It’s a UK film, so it’s even more foreign to me…It stars Beryl Reid and Susannah York as a bickering, May/December couple - one of whom is a dreadfully aging actress, the other a hot, young piece of sapphic flesh…They argue, sing a little, dance a little, scream a lot, throw stuff, yell some more while Beryl Reid, aka June Buckridge aka Sister George, yells at everyone else and is one big cranky ass mother fucker.  I love her…She gets shit on left and right and just pops up again, fists in the air like Bea Arthur’s Maude (but a lesbian…).

I always thought The Killing of Sister George was some murder mystery involving nuns, but it ain’t…It’s pure lesbianness of the highest order. An unapologetic look into a dysfunctional duo and a sad commentary on what we scumbags here in Hollywoods would once refer to as “THE BIZ”.   Beryl Reid’s final word at the end is just about the most heartbreaking thing I ever did hear in a movie that I still don’t entirely understand and really, why should I?  Lesbians are weird…But they get shit done ‘cause they ain’t out dancing and sniffing poppers with the likes of Al Pacino.  AAAAAADRIAN!!!!!!  From, Rock Hard

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